You may know someone who used to be a Jehovah’s Witness but isn’t any longer.

How can you help them?

By an ex-Jehovah’s Witness, I mean someone who falls into one of three categories:

• They have completely drifted away from the Watchtower organization, or
• They have formally disassociated, or
• They have been formally disfellowshipped by congregation elders.

These situations are far more common than you might think. Based on statistics published by the Watchtower organization itself, it has been estimated that as many as 950,000 Jehovah’s Witnesses have left the organization in a 10-year period.^[1]

Don’t start by inviting them to come to church with you. Ex-Witnesses often have a fear of and disdain for churches because of the Watchtower’s indoctrination against them.

Instead, ask if they are willing to tell you about their experiences as Jehovah’s Witnesses. If they don’t want to talk about it—and some don’t—respect their privacy. If they are willing to discuss it, you don’t need to cover everything in one discussion.

I am about to suggest a number of questions you can ask them, but don’t pepper them with questions to the point where you are upsetting them.

Take your time.

I would being by asking them how they became Jehovah’s Witnesses in the first place. Were they raised in the Watchtower or did they convert from some other religion?

Ask them how they left. Did they fade out over time by gradually doing less and less? Did they formally disassociate? If so, what did they give as their reasons, or did they just resign from the organization without specifying why?

If they left involuntarily by being disfellowshipped by the elders, I advise caution. You don’t know if they were disfellowshipped for immoral behavior or because of disagreement regarding Watchtower teachings. So first ask if they would mind revealing what grounds the elders gave for disfellowshipping them.

However they left, what have been the effects of their departure from the organization?

• Do they have family who are still Witnesses?
• Have they lost friends or a job because of it?
• Are they being shunned?
• How is that impacting them?
• Have they considered going back and going through the reinstatement process?
• What have been the hardest adjustments for them to make?

Listen far more than you talk.

Ask them if they would mind telling you their current views on spiritual matters. Don’t assume just because they have left the organization that they disagree with its theology or look favorably on biblical Christianity. Make clear that you don’t intend to argue with them or look down on them.

You are just trying to understand their spiritual journey.

Some leave the Watchtower because they are exhausted or because of a moral lapse but still believe the Watchtower system is “the truth.”

Still others leave because they have seen or experienced mistreatment or hypocrisy by Watchtower leaders or other Jehovah’s Witnesses.

Some people leave the Watchtower because they are burned out on religion altogether.

Many have become agnostics or atheists.

Adjust your approach depending on what they reveal to you.

If they are willing to discuss religion and indicate that they still believe the Watchtower teachings but haven’t been able to live up to them, give them your own testimony about God’s grace in your life.

If they left because of doctrinal differences, what do they believe now that is different from what the Watchtower teaches? What led them to believe differently? What is their view of the Bible now? Do they still trust it, or have they cast that aside along with the Watchtower?

How do they view churches now? Do they still agree with the Watchtower’s view that “Christendom” is evil—“a snare and a racket”—or have their views on this softened?

The better you understand them, the better you will be able to show them genuine Christian love. You may be the only Christian in their life who understands them and what they are going through.

If they want to be left alone as far as religion is concerned, let them know that you will honor their request.

Keep praying for them.

If they are open to the gospel, use the knowledge you have gained from this blog or from my book, Getting Through to Jehovah’s Witnesses: Approaching Bible Discussions in Unexpected Ways, in ministering to them.

[1] Leonard and Marjorie Chretien, Witnesses of Jehovah (Eugene: Harvest House, 1988), p. 15